If I ran the cable company…

I have this thought about three times a year. It is always sparked by annoyance and anger. Because of a broken system.

I wish I could tell you that this post is going to promote a good cause. It’s not. It’s a selfish, self-absorbed cause.

Cable television.

Scene:
Me. Sitting in front of the tv. Holding the Comcast remote. Guiding my up and down arrows through the millions of channels listed. Suddenly, I spot it. The movie/show/hockey game I’m dying to see. But then I look. Scowl at the tv and move on to a less desirable broadcast.
Why? Because I don’t get that one channel. The one channel I want.

Why? Because cable comes in lumped packages that are not tied up with pretty ribbons and bows. They’re tied up with ropes and duct tape. Forced deals that make you sign your life away and charge you for it every month.

Why? Because the cable company wants to make us miserable.

In today’s world, regardless of income and social status, everyone has the luxury of customization.

And we, the consumers, like customization. It makes us feel like we’re in control. It makes us feel like the company has heard us or predicted our needs.

If I ran the cable company, I would let people choose.

I’d rid the world of tightly bundled deals that cause consumer frustration. Some frustration digs into people to the point where they drop cable like a nail-biting-nose-picking habit. Because to them, they value choices. Freedom of choices.

So, I’d let people pick and choose their channels.

There would be a minimum and maximum number of channels every customer must meet – your monthly bill would reflect that minimum and maximum. And then there would be categories within that. Of course, basic channels would be a given – local news, major networks, local city news so people can watch town hall meetings. Premium channels (Stars, HBO) would still be premium. On Demand would remain virtually unchanged, except it would tailored your selected channels.

Sample of channels I would choose in this perfect cable world:

Home and Garden: min 2-max 4 channels
1.HGTV
2. DIY

Sports: min 4-max 8 channels
1. FSN North
2. NBC Sports (formerly Versus)
3. ESPN
4. ESPN2
5. ESPNU
6.NHL Network
7. CBS college sports
8. TSN

Travel and Learning: min 2-max five
1. Travel Channel
2. TLC
3. History
4. Biography

You get the point. You pick. You choose. You happy.

Since cable television has not revitalized the way we watch cable television, I have found ways around some “I don’t get that channel” moments.

Example: The other night, after the Gophers beat BU, I was all excited to watch the game on Sunday. Until I realized that FSN Plus was not going to pick up the broadcast. Only ESPNU. Who actually has ESPNU?! Well, a phone call to the cable company and it was discovered that one can try-out ESPNU for 30 days for FREE! Thus, I was able to watch the Gophers beat the Sioux in HD yesterday. And I’ll be able to watch the Gophers play BC on April 5.

Example: When a game is not televised, sometimes you can find live streaming online. With high speed internet, the game can be enjoyed straight from your laptop (or if you’re tech savvy, you can connect your laptop to your television and watch games that way). When the Gopher Women played Wisconsin for the National Championship, I watched from my laptop and was not disappointed with the coverage or the quality of the video.

This seems so silly, talking about cable television. Fixing cable television.

Yet, I think we can all agree that cable television consumers are paying too much for channels we don’t want or watch. And we’re not getting the channels we want to watch.

If I ran the cable company, it would be a la cart.

______________________________________

I ask. You answer.

1. Would you purchase a la cart cable television?
   
2. Do you ever get frustrated over channels you can’t watch?
   
3. What cable tricks do you have up your sleeve?

Who would I be now?

We all do it. Talk about it. Think about it. Remember it.

Those middle school and high school days we lived and breathed.

Those days we dreaded. Those years we love-hated.

Predominately good or bad, middle school and high school were times in our lives that we survived or thrived.

Some people peaked during their adolescents.

They were the people who had it all together. The ones who were good looking with brains to boot.

Some people were practically invisible during their adolescents.

They were the people who faded into backgrounds. The ones who were shy and smart to boot.

Then there were middle of the road-ers. Just like the middle class, these people were there. They had friends and moments of popularity. They were friends with everyone; the good looking and shy.

Some kids we knew were going on to bigger and better things. While some kids we knew were going on to a life of low-expectations and limited self-esteem.

Well, here we are. Out of those dreaded or delightful years. For those who peaked, you miss those times; the popularity. For those who survived, you kissed those times goodbye; the loneliness and loser-ness. For those who rode the center line, you liked those times; the joys and jerks.

Whatever lens you wear when you think back on your teenage dreams, we all know that who we are now is not who we were then.

And I wonder, who would I be now?

If I was in ninth grade, what would I be like? If the me I am now was thrown back into the world of gossiping and giggling, boys and braces, how would I act? Would my experiences (8 years since high school graduation) make me a different middle schooler or high schooler?

I’d like to think it would.

As a middle schooler and high schooler, I was more insecure and more confident than I am now. Contradictory, yes, but true. Maybe it wasn’t confidence. Maybe it was my naive developing brain that made me feel invincible; capable of anything life threw my way. Maybe that’s why I could do those teenage things I shake my head at today.

Yelling things out loud in public for the whole mall to hear. Calling across a room of crowded teens to a cute boy. Driving like a maniac to impress friends.

If the me I am now, full of experiences and expectations, were to step into the shoes of a high schooler today – would I make it? Could I hack it? Is today’s world that much harder than the world I learned to maneuver pre- and post-9/11? Would I use what I know now to make things better or would I fall into the trappings of peer-pressure and clique-policitcs?

Would I re-invent myself? Be more daring? Choose a different group of friends? Try out for different things? Work harder and worry less? Care more or be more careless? Make the same mistakes or new ones? Would I choose the college I chose?

Who would I be now?

This isn’t a Disney movie. I’m not Matthew Perry disguised as Zac Efron. I’m not Jamie Lee Curtis playing her (thankfully not real life) daughter, Lindsey Lohan.

I’m just living a real life. I’m just me. And I’m me because of who I was then.

Who would I be now?

I’d be me.

____________________________________________

I ask. You answer.

1. Who would you be now?
   
2. Have you ever wondered what it would be like to go back?
   
3. Do you think we can still relate to teenagers or do you think the world has changed to a point where we’re now clueless?
   
4. What would you do differently if you were to go back?

Done.

Thanks to facebook’s new timeline, I was able to glimpse into my social media past and see what was what back in the day. What I found were some hilarious comments from friends. The comments weren’t ones that you would laugh over. They were those private joke comments you had to be there to understand.

At the end of college, days before our diplomas and and “oh, crap…we’re adults” moment, my friend commented on our finals. Grueling senior projects and papers. All she said was, “We’re done. Goodbye.”

Those words brought back memories. They made me laugh. Her sarcasm rang through in every word.

But her words, simple and honest, mean the same thing now as they did then.

They describe, with every ounce of my being, how I feel about my mom’s chemo journey coming to an end. A journey I never thought I’d journey. A journey I am more than happy to see come to an end.

We’re on our way now. About to sit one last time in the cancer treatment center with other wonderful people, all of whom are undeserving of this thing called cancer. They’re all from different walks of life. Their cancer is personal; just for them. But it is still cancer. Awful. some of them are just starting out. Some are right in the middle-the start so fresh in their mind, the end so far. And some, like my mom, are almost done.

My mom will fight today. She’ll battle it out one last time. The chemo will zone in on the tumor, now tiny and weak, and it will destroy whatever is left like an ICBM aimed at the enemy.

And when it does, we can say, “We’re done. Goodbye.”

Thank you to everyone who has battled with us. Thank you for your prayers and support, cards and care. My mom will undergo surgery to remove the rest of the tumor and tissue. Then the plan is for radiation. We appreciate your continued prayers. But right now, we party!em>

The age of discovery

Throughout my life, I have sought to discover who I am.

I know the basics. The facts that I mark on applications and email subscriptions. But there are things that my Banana Republic email form did not request. Things that I didn’t know about myself. Until I discovered them – accidentally or on purpose.

Sometimes people told me things about who I am – or who they thought I was. I learned to take their declarations with a grain of salt. To toss their comments out the window or to listen and learn from their observations – good or bad.

Sometimes I stumbled on my own two feet and fell flat on my face – staring at my true self – good and bad.

Sometimes I was guided through tests (Myers-Briggs, Strengths Finder, animal personalities, career assessments, etc.) in order to earn high school and college credits or to better prep for an interview.

Sometimes I found myself agreeing with someone else – famous or not – and after a few too many nods and “mmmmmhmmmm’s” I would finally admit that I held certain beliefs about serious and silly things in life that I never knew until that point in time.

In all those times, I was surprised and relieved by what man-made tests revealed about me. I’d say things like, “Oh, that’s why I do that.” Or “Oh, good. I’m not crazy.”
After every test, every discovery, I’d think that I was done. That there was nothing left to discover. That I was always going to be that way or that I would never be that way.

Well, I discovered that I was wrong. There’s always something new to learn. I always have something hidden that needs to be uncovered; something just below the surface that needs the safe-to-come-out signal. I always have more of me to give. I never have it all figured out. No single test can completely reveal all of me.

So, today I have finally arrived. I am never going to quit seeking who I am and who I want to be.

“Never stop exploring” – The North Face

Looks like I need another jacket. Because I’m going on an exploration. It may take me above the clouds or under the sea, but I don’t care.

I’m in the age of discovery and I’m here to stay.