My apologies for abandoning my blogging routine. Or non routine. Ahem.
As documented in the archives of this blog, my family has been through some crazy times this past year. I’ve eluded to more personal struggles in some posts; discussing my inner thoughts and that life hasn’t been rosy.
I put parts of my life on hold while my parents were dealing with their health issues. I was more than happy to do so.
But I changed my lifestyle so I could be the daughter of a breast cancer patient and then survivor. The oldest child of a stroke victim and survivor. And along with those changes, I encountered some major personal and professional life changes. Changes I wrestled and fought. Changes I eventually accepted, at first begrudgingly and then graciously.
Now, I’m past most of that stuff. Never done learning from it or discovering how to be a better person, but done with the nitty gritty parts that caused me sleepless nights and a haunting sense of fear that followed me like Peter Pan’s Shadow.
I’m on a new path. Another new path. I seem to cycle through these quite often. Maybe it shows lack of consistency or commitment. But if you know my story, you know that it’s just me. Part of a bigger plan that I can’t control, but plan on following wherever it leads me.
Which brings me to the present.
Face to face with another Megan.
I’m a new me, but that’s not what I mean.
I am talking about another woman named Megan. Spelled the same (right way!).
It’s happened plenty of times before. In a camp cabin. At a youth group event. During college freshman orientation.
I run into Megan’s everywhere. It’s not odd. It’s something I’ve grown accustomed to.
But I may be alone in that boat. Because everyone around us, us meaning me and whatever other Megan I am with, seems thrown off by the presence of two Megan’s.
Puzzling. Other names are much more popular and multiples pop up like dandelions. Other names are much less common and show up all over town two-by-two.
So, I guess it is confusing as to why two Megan’s – neither an overly popular or severely uncommon name – causes such a stir.
Then I got to thinking.
Maybe it’s because of who we are. As Megan’s.
Never have I ever met a Megan I did not like. And I’ve met a lot of Megan’s.
Let’s see…there’s the Megan from figure skating, Megan from down the street, Megan from camp, Megan I babysat from the neighborhood (she was friends with another family I babysat — that family’s kids called me “Big Megan” and her “Little Megan” — if you know me at all, you know that I am in no way tall or large), Megan from that youth group trip, Megan my second or third cousin — my dad’s cousin’s daughter, Megan from college — correction, I knew about 6 Megan’s in college (one Megan’s last name started with “M” and she was in every single one of my classes sophomore year — we were bio partners), Megan the high school babysitter (I was a nanny for a family who had a high school girl watch the kids when I was unavailable — I was “College Megan” she was “high school Megan.” UNTIL I graduated and became “Hockey Megan”), Megan’s from multiple classrooms I taught in as a student, Megan’s from volunteer projects in college/early post-college, Megan’s at my last place of work, and now, this Megan. New co-worker Megan.
Despite the fact that I have never looked anything like any of the Megan’s I’ve known, everyone around us is confused. They mix us up. Think I’m Megan and she’s Megan. People have come up to me telling me information that I don’t understand because I’m not the right Megan.
I hear the name Megan called out and begin answering the question before someone says, “The other Megan.”
It must be the name. The personality comes with the name. The similarities I’ve shared with these Megan’s over the years continues to astonish me.
There are two of me floating around everywhere I go.
And that’s comforting. More so now than ever. Because I need that reminder. Another Megan to remind me who I am. To bring me back to being my true self.
Life will continue to challenge and change me. But my name is with me for good. And if I happen to run into some other Megan’s while conquering new heights, I know that I will be a better Megan because of it.
Here’s to all the Megan’s out there. May you find your true self in another Megan.